Venting

When is enough enough? I wish someone could look me straight in the eye and tell me I have not been through hell and back already. Why must things continue to challenge me? I can not answer that question. If I could believe me I would.

What's more disrespectful, speaking your mind for all to see or speaking your mind behind peoples backs and then befriending them to their face? If I would have a say in the matter I would have to say that talking behind peoples backs is wrong. Then turning around and acting like they are your friend is down right well, fucked up. I'm very tired of taking heat for being who I am. I've been dealing with that my whole life it seems. I am not all shine and glamour. I'm rough around the edges and my shine is on the dull side. For people to get pissed off about what I say or write is fine, but showing dislike for it behind my back is bullshit especially if it was something done long ago. People need to grow up and come in off the play ground. Recess ended long ago.

Call me insane, but I'd take living in the country over the city any day of the week.

I love my "sissypants" very much. We didn't have the smoothest of weekends, but the circumstances I feel speak for themselves. I am very grateful to have spent my first birthday with the woman I love. No matter the mood, she is very special to me and will never be any less.

Connor was very vocal the other night. He has this little light up/play music jobby that hangs in his crib. It is filled with water and fake fish. Well we had that playing and he was just gabbing away to the fish. It almost made my sexy mama cry. I have to say he was very cute and if we had a camcorder I would have gotten it then. I'm hopeful before too long we will have one.

What do you call someone whos so inappreciative of everything they have they fail to see it? Lazy? Ungrateful? Selfish? Yes to all of them. Here's a toast to maturity, may it come sooner than later.

I feel better now.

Later.